Love Can Be So
by SupahStarmon
Summary: Umi is finally beginning to get over her fear of love and affection. However, she finds that she only gets through this phase by actually finding people to love.


Love can be so…complicated.

I, Umi Sonoda, was always very hesitant towards love. Well, probably disgusted by it. There were only some types of love that I was comfortable around. Love from my family and love from my friends were the only love that I could accept.

But the romantic type? In the past, it would make me shudder. The amount of intimacy and public displays of affection…how could anyone enjoy that?! I would hide my eyes from people who were kissing on the streets and flirting. I could handle hugs and things like that since that's a show of friendliness. But anything past that would just be wrong! I couldn't even watch movies that had kissing and that show of love without having a panic attack!

But…that was the past. I'm finally understanding what everyone wants to experience in the future. The romantic kind of love, I finally get it.

Because I'm in love. In love with my friend, Honoka Kousaka.

It's hard to think when it started, but I guess it was at the end of our first year in high school. We've been best friends for all these years along with Kotori Minami, and I feel like I've treated her like I always do. I help her out and while she does get upset, she would try and do whatever I assist her with. She teases me and is kind of dumb. But she would always be a precious friend. I just didn't realize that she could be **this** precious to me.

* * *

I was working on some homework in Kotori's room while Kotori was getting snacks. Honoka was going to come as well, but she had some family matters that were important. So, it was just me and Kotori.

I had just finished the last math question when Kotori came back with a tray that had some cookies and tea. She saw me leaning back and asked, "Did you finish it?"

I nodded. "Yeah. I just remembered how to solve this last part." She placed the tray on the table and sat back down. As a sort of reward, I took a cream-filled cookie and took a bite. "Ah, this is good!"

Kotori smiled as she picked up her pencil to begin working again. "Thank you! I just finished these cookies yesterday. I was hoping they would still be good."

"It is! Honoka would want these as well, they're delicious." Kotori giggled, which caught me by surprise. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing," she replied with a sly smile. "Could you help me with the last question?"

I obliged, because not helping would be mean especially since she just gave me snacks. After talking out the last math question for a few minutes, we were relaxing by watching a movie while eating the cookies that Kotori made.

We were about two-thirds into the movie and just got to the climax when Kotori paused the film.

"Kotori? What's wrong?" I asked her, confused because Kotori's a person that never pauses a movie and just finishes it to the end. It was a shame since I was getting into the movie.

"I was just confirming something," she replied.

I looked at her, puzzled. "What?"

"Umi-chan, you know what that movie was about right?" She asked me.

It was such an odd question, but I wasn't going to just brush it aside. "Yes. Two high school friends never told their feelings to each other, but with college coming they finally confess. I was really excited for the ending, I wanted to see if they would be together at the end."

"Hmm," Kotori dully hummed. "You do know that they were kissing, right?"

"Yeah," I replied plainly.

"You **are** in love," Kotori said in some sort of realization.

I felt my eyes squint, then widen immediately. "How could you say that I'm in love?!"

Kotori pointed at the screen. The movie was paused on the two protagonists on a phone call. They were just talking about wanting to be together, but they were both so hesitant. "This type of movie is something you would have quickly stopped watching. If we kept watching, you would have freaked out at their kiss."

"That doesn't mean I'm in love, Kotori," I tell her. She sounded ridiculous. "I've just matured."

"Not in a year, Umi-chan," Kotori responded. "You are the most mature person that I know. But when it comes to love, you wouldn't be so on board with it so soon.

Besides, I know the person you are in love with," Kotori said.

I looked at her now with disbelief. "I don't even know who I love. I know you understand a lot about me Kotori, but I think you sound crazy."

She shook her head. She didn't look mad nor disappointed, but I saw that there was a glimmer in her eyes trying to get to the bottom of…this.

"Besides being not shaken from romance movies, I've seen how you act around the person you love," Kotori continued to announce. "You like Honoka-chan!"

"W-W-WHAT?!" I shout. "There's no way I like Honoka that way! She's my best friend!"

"And that's the thing," Kotori said slyly. "Since she's our best friend, I've seen how you both are around each other. Before, you were always a bit harsher on her and Honoka-chan was always resisting to do work. But now, I've noticed that she does her work a lot more when you help her, and I've seen you become nicer to her when it comes to homework."

'Is…Is that for real?' I thought to myself. I never thought about it like that. I thought that I always treated Honoka the same as I always have. I felt my face warming up. "How did you notice that, Kotori?"

She giggled. "I'm both yours and Honoka-chan's best friend. Since I'm around you guys all the time, it would be hard not to notice things."

"That…doesn't prove anything, right?" I asked. I doubt myself since this revelation came.

Kotori giggled to herself. "It's not hard to see when someone likes another person. Let me ask you some questions." She turned to me and looked in my eyes with a more serious expression. "Do you want to be around Honoka-chan, alone?"

I blushed at the thought. "I would want to be…I guess it's fine," I hesitantly responded.

She nodded. "Do you think about her a lot? What's she's doing, if she's feeling well…if you think she would enjoy some cookies?"

I felt my face flush even harder. I couldn't believe that Kotori could remember that mundane comment. Wouldn't she want everyone to enjoy her food? But…I did say Honoka's name first. Does that mean anything? "I…I don't know…"

"How much do you want her to be here?" Kotori asked.

And I could feel it. I love being around Kotori. But without Honoka, I feel so incomplete. I want her to be here because it makes us complete.

It would make me feel complete.

I sigh heavily and I feel tears form in my eyes. "I'm sorry, Kotori…"

I crumple down, bring my knees to my chest, and set my head down on them. I felt Kotori kneel over and she began to pat my head. "It's alright, Umi-chan. I want her to be here too. But don't worry about me. I can see you care about her a lot. Do you love her?"

I thought about all the things that Kotori said about my feelings. I thought about how important Honoka is to me. I thought about everything that we went through. I felt like I wanted to deny it. But…

I do love her.

I nodded as much as I could while staying in my position. I heard Kotori get up and begin to gather the dishes on the table.

"You know, Honoka likes you too."

My head perked up. "W-What?" My eyes met Kotori's warm gaze and her loving smile.

"Like I said, I've noticed how both of you are around each other. Neither of you are that great at hiding your emotions, but Honoka is a bit better at it." Kotori laughed, probably thinking about the times when she saw me and Honoka act lovingly around each other. "Here's what you do: tomorrow at lunch, take Honoka and talk about your feelings for each other. I don't think it would hurt to try," Kotori said.

"I…I guess not," I said to myself out loud. I didn't mean to say it so Kotori could hear but when I looked at her after I said it, I saw her smiling even more.

…

The next day goes in a blur up until lunch. Throughout the first half of the day, I was dreading my confession. Kotori's encouragement from yesterday was helpful, but still…

This is the first time I had ever even thought about romantic love. Not just that, but with Honoka! My best friend, someone I hold dear to my heart. I never would have thought that my heart would say that I love her in that way.

But…what happens after? Do we just continue to do the normal stuff that we always do? Kotori said she wouldn't feel left out, but that's just a lie. Right? Wouldn't she want to be around us?

And what happens if things aren't what I thought? Do we actually like each other? What if it ends because we don't like each other? There's so much that could go wrong!

I guess, things can go right as well too.

"Umi-chan?" Kotori says in a louder voice, I assumed. I didn't even notice that both Kotori and Honoka were at my desk. Kotori had a look of concern, as did Honoka. "Are you alright?"

I coughed to clear my muddled thoughts. "Yes. I apologize if I was looking a little worried."

"What were you thinking about, Umi-chan?" Honoka asked. I feel the blush rush to my face, and Kotori noticed as well. She motioned me to take Honoka somewhere so we could talk.

I was still for quite a while, but I saw the warmth in Kotori's eyes. I stood up and grabbed Honoka's hand. "Could you come with me, Honoka?" I asked her. I noticed the slight ting of pink on her cheeks which I found cute.

"Does Kotori-chan want to-to come with us?" Honoka asked. I could sense the nervousness coming from Honoka. Her blush began to darken, and I felt her hand squeezing mine tighter.

Kotori waved her arm in front of her face. "It's alright, Honoka-chan. It seems like Umi-chan wants to talk to you about something important." She responds to Honoka's question.

I began to walk out of the classroom. Looking back, I could see Honoka not resisting and Kotori giving me a thumbs up. I felt a small boost of confidence. 'I really can do this' I thought to myself.

I bring myself and Honoka to the rooftop. I checked around and took a breath of relief since no one was up here. I turned to Honoka and she still had her cute blush on her face. 'Maybe Kotori is right,' I thought to myself happily.

"Honoka," I call to her. I noticed her head was staring at the ground before she perked her head up to look at me. "I have something to tell you." I took another breath as I saw Honoka hanging onto my word. "I…I like you. A lot."

Immediately, I saw Honoka's eyes widen and her lips form into the brightest smile I've seen from her before. "Are you being serious, Umi-chan?" She asked me. I could hear the nerves as she spoke every word.

"I am," I tell her. I couldn't react fast enough before she rushed at me and gave me a big hug. And while I would be opposed to it if I was the old Umi, I couldn't help but return the embrace.

"Are you saying…you would be my girlfriend?" She asks me while she looked up to my eyes. I felt the hope emanating from her eyes. And I only had one answer.

"Yes."

* * *

**A/N:** **It's been a while, hasn't it?**

**This is a story that I have been thinking about for a while, but I still felt the burnout from before. For some reason, I just had an urge to write as school was starting. And now…here I am.**

**I am happy to say that I can feel some sort of energy while writing now and I am enjoying it quite a bit.**

**For this story, I decided to go with the first person as a sort of practice for my writing class since that should be focused on first person writing (about myself, but I can enjoy fiction writing here).**

**I have the story mapped out in my head, so I just need to write the rest of the chapters. However, although I do have the ideas, I do not have anything about them written down yet. And with schoolwork that I have to do and club work that I want to enjoy, I can't say I have a time when the next chapter will be out.**

**If you do want to know when it comes out, give this story a follow! And if you did like the story, give it a favourite as well! I would appreciate it. Also, please send in a lot of comments since I would like to read everything you guys say! Be it praise or criticism, please don't be afraid to comment and tell me what you thought.**

**Thanks for Reading!**


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